I’ve been realizing more and more how important it is for me to step into a regular, committed spiritual practice that honors my heart. I do so through many spirit and energy-led tasks every day (reading, writing, class developing, creating and gratitude-giving for Living Sensual Institute and Piper Lauri Salogga Interiors) and what I’m yearning for is to follow through on an every-morning ritual that connects me to the beautiful, abundant, loving energy of Life – before I do anything else with my day.
When I do this, this morning ritual, all of Life seems to gather about me in support of what I want to accomplish. When I do this, like Cinderella and the magnificent fairies and creatures that spin and become the glorious gown, stunning, speedy chariot and transparent, delicate slippers that fit just right, it is as if the seeming slow sludge of daily irritations drift away and my path is paved with long, flowing, smooth silk. Grace. Right timing. Ease in it all. And what may seem bumpy or jagged to others, and me on a non-connected day, feels like natural rolling hills in the perfect landscape of Life.
So why have I not yet followed through on this every-morning ritual if the gifts it gives are so bountiful? How could I possibly, “duh,” not have this one down by now?!
Thank god for the gentler, wiser part of me that understands that my old habitrail mind and body, my old inner-compass, magnetically attracted to and pointing toward comfort, still goads me to back off what my intuition is guiding me to do in order to be my healthiest, most empowered self, it still taunts me to stay in the safety of my known territory.
This is the truth of expansion – too much of a good thing gives most of us the heebeejeebees – makes us want to run like mad in the opposite direction. Too much of a good thing feels like Risk. After all of these years of practice and insight, I still find it odd that getting what I want can be so uncomfortable.
Like building any muscle at the gym, there is the whining pain of growth. Expanding into more good, we are building the muscle of receiving, stretching ourselves to say "Yes" to more of what we want. And, when we lean into all this good feeling, good outcome and good stuff we’re out on our own plank, we’re beyond our boat’s foundation, and the pain of reacclimation is upon us. When we stretch and grow we are in need of developing a new comfort zone, out on that plank, until our boat gets bigger to meet our new expanded Self.
Getting used to this process, knowing that this discomfort – sometimes anxiousness, sometimes fear, sometimes unexpected sadness – is sitting alongside all our excitement and hope for the vision we are stepping into, knowing this feeling is present can help us stay put and make friends with the shadow of our stretch, stay put and wait for the foundation of the boat’s edge to come meet us again. So we stay put with kindness to ourselves, and patience, and Trust! Trusting Life to show up when we need it. Trusting the process of expansion to get us through to the other side. Trusting ourselves to follow-through in the face of our discomfort.
Risking to step into a fuller me and a more satisfying, joyful life that fulfills me and all those I come into relationship with is worth the growing pains, big time, because I love the territory, the renewed me and how I interact with the world, once I’m through the squeeze.
Make sure to check out the Stepping Out of Self-Sabotage workshop this coming Wednesday – we've been hearing much enthusiasm for this class and I think it's going to be a powerful one.
Happy New Year!
May all you want for yourself come to meet you.
And may we come to meet all we want for each other and our planet.
to Living Sensual!
Live in Love with Life